My flight out left at about 5:30am Sunday morning, which meant I had to be at the airport around 3:30am (which is when the airport opens, apparently), which meant I had to leave my mom's house at 1am-ish in the morning. Which ended up meaning that I got no sleep the night before. I tried to sleep, but just found myself laying in bed awake.
Needless to say, I was tired when I got to the airport. I almost forgot to take my shoes off at the security point, which made me look like a fool. I grabbed a bag of gummy lifesavers to try to jolt me with sugar, but I found myself dead asleep on the short flight to Philadelphia. I had only about 20min to get from one gate to the next. Fortunately they were right next to each other so I had some time to walk and get myself awake. The airport had a ton of merchandise from "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" which I love, so I came very close to buying something. Thankfully I saved my money.
My next flight took me right to Denver and, as usual, I fell right asleep on the plane. I never have trouble falling asleep on planes. I actually have trouble keeping awake. Not sure why. Anyway, I got off the plane and took the cute little train to the terminal where baggage claim and transportation was before realizing I'd left my iPod on the plane. I had to get a gate pass, go back through security, and back on the train to get it. Oh, and then the lady at the bus kiosk told me the wrong bus while she was crimping her hair, talking on her cell phone, and watching TV. So I took the wrong bus and had to transfer back. I finally arrived in Boulder around 5pm their time, which is 7pm East Coast time. I was dead tired. I checked in and just started to crash while getting ready for classes the next day.
I met my first roommate, who had already been there for a week, and my first impression was that he was gay, shy, and totally unfuckable. The kid hunched, never spoke, hid in his room, and never looked clean. He had affected a look of being dirty (one that I would see on many others in my grad program) even though I knew that he showered daily. I don't know how you can use body wash and still look like a pool of slime, but he managed it.
The second roommate was sharing a room with me. Our beds were close enough together that it seemed as though we might as well have had one bed. He was much nicer and much more fun to talk to, but straight as an arrow. You know the "gaydar" a lot of people have? Mine's pretty good, and he didn't even register. Which was fine, I wasn't that concerned. I was sure that I'd be able to find someone in Colorado who would want some of me. I was amazed by how wrong I was.
|See how close the beds were?|
Not only did I not get any interest from the dirty-looking hipster kids on campus, but a guy I had been talking with online for a while about meeting up while I was there stood me up. He and I even talked earlier that week about meeting on Saturday, and Friday night I sent him multiple messages asking about time/place and gave him my cell number to contact me. Friday ended and Saturday rolled through and still no call or email or even short text. In fact, I haven't seen him online since. I had his number and was tempted to send an angry text, but I just said, "Fuck it," and walked around an artsy strip mall and didn't buy anything.
It isn't like I haven't been stood up before, but this guy had seemed different. He really wanted to meet me. It was OK that I didn't have a car. He would drive up to me. No problem. But then the sudden silence. Friday I had been worried, but Saturday I was just done. I was done with trying for sex and I was done with my damn trip and my grad program.
Why? Well on Friday of the week I was out there (you know, after I had already been living in the university housing and taking classes for a full week), I was told that, surprise! I hadn't really qualified for financial aid even though they told me I had. Apparently I would have had to sign up for at least 3 weeks to qualify and because I'd been ill and dropped one of the weeks I no longer did. Thing is, when I sent in my acceptance of the financial aid statement, I had mentioned that I was only going for two weeks. I told a lot of people I was only there for two weeks. Did anyone say a thing? No. If I had known I didn't qualify, I would have just skipped this summer and made it up later. Instead, I'm not saddled with having to pay for the week I was there, full tuition and registration fees, as well as the housing fee. And for some dumb reason they want me to pay for two weeks of housing even though I only stayed for one (I'm fighting this).
So now I owe my grad program over $2000 for a week of classes, which would be a lot even if I wasn't jobless and currently without an apartment. And to top it off, I had to leave early, which meant cancelling my original flight for July 3rd, and making a quick arrangement to fly out this past Monday. There was some extra money I didn't really have to spend. And I had to quickly pack up Sunday night and leave with little notice to anyone because I needed to meet a 7:21am bus to the airport Monday morning.
My flights back went much more smoothly and I managed to be back at my place by 11:30pm Monday night. I was totally exhausted and pretty much fell into bed. The next day I thought about moping around the house and just being miserable (much like I was before leaving for school), but then I was talking to some guys on Twitter who I'm getting close with and I realized that I needed to turn my attitude around. I needed to get out there and just do things for myself, just have a good time for me.
So lately I've been running in the morning when I get up. Not far, but enough to get my blood pumping. Then, in the afternoons, I've been laying out on my patio in small speedos to work on my tan. I've decided that I'm going to get into the shape I used to be in. Not for some guy or girl, and certainly not because I'm letting my body image issues get the best of me. I'm getting in shape and getting tan and getting sexy because it makes me happy and I want to do it. And with that attitude, I was finally able to break out of my dry spell, a story I will tell next week when I am back from my trip.
|I did get a nice picture of the mountains while walking to the bus station.|