Sunday, October 30, 2011

Formspring and the Wonderful Saturday

I know I have been somewhat angst-ridden lately with how things are not going well for me and how I have portions of every day that go well, but never a full day, etc. I figured I would talk about how wonderful my day was yesterday. Those of you who follow me on Twitter heard bits and pieces, but what was probably the most telling notice that I was having fun was the lack of my online presence. It isn't that I don't like you guys, but when I'm having a good time I am much less likely to get on my phone and check the internet. I mostly do that when I'm bored or alone. And yesterday I was neither. I was able to finally hook up with a friend who lives in the city that I hadn't seen in almost a month (no joke, she and I have both been very busy).

I woke up after going to bed early and sleeping in and we met up early, then went off to lunch together. At lunch we related to each other many stories of our recent days and complained and shared joy, and by the time we left the restaurant, it was starting to rain pretty hard. We caught the subway and stopped on our way to seeing The Rum Diary to try and get an umbrella at the BU Barnes and Noble. Of course it was way too expensive, so we eventually found ourselves soaked and at a sports bar, getting drunk at 2:30 in the afternoon. I'm going to gloss over The Rum Diary because it was a truly awful movie in which we were forced to watch Johnny Depp be drunk and unattractive while his character did literally nothing. We wound up back at the bar after before going back to her apartment and finishing off the night with The Princess Bride and popcorn.

On my way home, the snow had piled up and the weather was cold. I passed a lot of angry drunk people and saw girls in nothing but underwear and a coat trying to keep warm. Apparently young women are stupid enough to go out in the cold rainy/snowy mix in naught but fishnets and panties on Halloween weekend. I hope being some frat boy's practice fuck was worth it. Yes. I'm judging them for being slutty. The irony is not lost on me. In any case, when I got home it was to see that some trees on my street were down (and landed on cars) causing me to actually have to cross to the other side of the street on my way back. Fortunately none of the downed trees were near me, but I am a little concerned about how the rest of the trees are going to handle the coming winter.

Now that all of that wonderful news is out of the way, I will step aside and let you all enjoy some Formspring questions. I love answering these, so feel free to ask me more. And as always, feel free to email me questions, or ask them in the comments.

Can guys fake an orgasm?

Oh yeah. Not as hard as you might think. Especially if you wear a condom and then take it off where the other person can't see it.

Are you angry that Horrible Bosses made a lot of money because it will encourage Jennifer Aniston to make more movies?

Woah. Who suddenly hates Jennifer Aniston. I actually found her quite funny in that movie. And I'm physically attracted to her. And I love Friends. What a strange question.

You're bisexual?!?!? Sigh.

I like all genders. Is that a problem? I really don't appreciate how there are men in the gay community that see bisexuality as a problem. Or a phase. Trust me: I've had sex with enough women and men to know that I'm not just confused. And I'm not just going to switch to one or the other eventually.

How much did you shave when you were swimming?

All of my body. Pubes, ass, back, everything. I even shaved my head two times, but don't look good like that at all.

Would you rather be rich or would you rather be in love?

Depends. Honestly, if I'm in love but can't afford food, I won't be in love long. Hunger truly does make love fly out the door. I've seen it happen to a couple I knew who were both in grad school full time. So if by not being rich, I'm dirt poor: I would rather be rich. However, I have comfortably lived in the lower middle class my whole life and would gladly stay there with someone I love.

Do most guys who swim and shave shave everything?

The ones who are serious about it do. If you don't shave what the suit covers, your hair will come through the pores in the spandex of the suit. This will cause drag at best, but at worst it will pull on those hairs while you swim. I don't know anyone who would swim the mile (my top event) while getting their pubes pulled out.

How do you deal with a family member who's a drama queen?

I don't deal with them. Too many of them in my family. If someone pulls that shit with me, it is over. I've cut family out of my life for shit like that.

Have you ever served on a jury? Do you think you could be impartial?

I have not, but for the most part, I think I can be impartial easily. I had to learn to be impartial to deviant behavior when I was a sociology major. It isn't that hard to give people a chance to explain themselves.

Are you a little monster?

Not really. I used to like Lady Gaga a lot, but I'm at a point with her music where not enough of it is good enough to keep me interesting. Give me some Tina Turner or Blonde any time and my fun-crazy lady fix is full.

What or who has frightened you since you were a child?

Spiders scare the fuck out of me, though I am getting better about that. The strange part is that I actually loved them when I was younger. I'd let them crawl on me and would play with them. Just the idea of that makes me shudder now.

That's all for this post. I hope you all have fun reading my responses and take the time to ask me more. I love answering these questions and sharing stuff that you wouldn't normally get through the blog.


  1. Good to see you perking up, lately.

    Thanks for the low-down on Rum Diary. We usually try to catch anything with Depp, but it sounds like this one is worth missing 'til it hits TV.

  2. Kevin,

    I'm happy about that too.

    And yeah. This one is worth missing. I hear bad things about the book too. Apparently it wouldn't have been published, but Depp convinced Hunter S. Thompson to publish it so that he could option the movie. Which goes to show that actors don't always have the best taste in literature.


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